How to Deal with Guilt

by Lester Rennard

There are countless individuals who go through life carrying with them a weighty baggage of guilt that constantly drains them of energy, zest and all reasons to continue living. They may have committed acts in the past for which they are now not proud and are unable to accept forgiveness or to forgive themselves. They feel undeserved of grace and are always beating upon themselves in an effort to punish themselves, thinking that by so doing they may feel some sense of worthiness that may earn them forgiveness. But the more they try to measure up, the more they see their imperfections and the less they see themselves meriting of forgiveness and the more intense their feelings of guilt.

If the cycle is not broken, many in despair are driven to depression and suicide. Others continue existing at less than their potential, becoming a burden to themselves, a pain to those with whom they interact and a liability to life itself. The more religious and ignorant of spiritual truths such individuals are, the more likely it is for them to struggle along under the weight of this burden called guilt.

We all deal with guilt at different times in our lives. It is either real or imagined, legitimate or illegitimate but nonetheless demands our attention and resolution. Real or legitimate guilt is the consequential emotional response to the conviction that one has committed an act that violates his or her values, conscience or a law. When a wrong act is actually committed, guilt becomes nature's law enforcement agent issuing you with a ticket for your day in court.

When one is confronted with feelings of guilt under such circumstances of doing a wrong act, that guilt is legitimate that needs to be addressed and reconciled. The proper way to deal with this kind of guilt is not to deny it, suppress it or try to cover up the wrong act or to rationalize or justify one's action. Effective resolution requires an acknowledgement of the violation and the wrongness of the act, taking responsibility for one's action, demonstrating genuine remorse, making restitution where applicable, asking the forgiveness of the one violated, forgiving yourself, making reconciliation as necessary and choosing not to walk that road again. Your case in court has been disposed of and that guilt is no longer valid. If this guilt comes back to haunt you, do not acknowledge it or entertain it in any fashion. You have already had your day in court and the charges are no longer against you. Move on!

There is another kind of guilt that traumatizes many people to the extent that might drive some to the brink of insanity. They have no real convictions of actual wrongs committed yet they go about blaming themselves for imagined wrongs they have done. This is a common problem suffered by many individuals with a neurotic mental health disorder. This false sense of guilt keeps its victims in a constant state of anxiety and doom. They cannot accept forgiveness and they cannot forgive themselves and as an extention, they cannot truly forgive others also. They are very difficult to live with, walk around under a dark cloud, hypersensitive and tend to bring a chill into any room into which they enter. Those who suffer from this chronic disorder may do well to seek the clinical help of mental health professionals to free themselves from this bondage.

The spiritual implication of guilt is that God forgives the sinner who willingly accepts such forgiveness, repents of sin and chooses to no longer walk in its path. When He forgives the sinner, He removes the guilt of sin and frees one from the condemnation that comes packaged with every sin. There is no need to carry around the weighty baggage of guilt when forgiveness and reconciliation are so freely available to those who desire to walk in true freedom.